OUCHIES!

Haven't updated in a while and there isn't much to talk about. Only that during lunch two girls dug their nails into me. >_>

I was just trying to look at my friend's notes for a book and it became a small tug-of-war for the book. Soon after, one, no TWO! girls started smacking me and punching me. It was not long until they dug their claws into my arm.

Right now my skin is still ripped and there are a bunch of marks on my skin. That wasn't the reason I let go. They started to pinch me. Stupid h4x.

A Sweet Little Song in B7

blue eyes i could look into forever
blond radiant hair that rivals even mine
brilliant beauty incarnate in front of me
bright voice each day soothing the soul
by nine thirty i gain such serenity
but it is acquired without extra effort
because seeing you is all it takes

OH SH**

Well, you can see the title that something insane happens! :O That'll be the second story. We will, however, start something still pretty insane.

Have you ever heard of McLean Bible Church? If you have, then you can just skip this story. Well, it's a pretty damn big church. Have you heard of Tyson's Corner in Virginia? It's a pretty damn big mall, man. That's one of the reasons why the east coast is quite "in-fashion" or whatever. Well, McLean Bible Church has a parking lot BIGGER THAN TYSON'S CORNER. Wtf? They also got a skating rink and stuff. Well, they're so big, they outbought Starbucks or something. Wow. Wao, mahn.

---------------------------------------------------------

Well, main story comes now. I was going home in my friend's car from church after a praise practice. It's about 10:20 when we left and we should have gotten home at about... 10:40.

Anyways, we're going down the highway, music's turned up loud. We're in the neighborhood near my house (just a couple miles). All of a sudden, we hear sirens. Oh crap. Thankfully, it was legal for my friend to drive my brother and me. But oh crap, man.

My friend doesn't know what to do because he's never been pulled over so he stops in the middle of the road on this thingy. The police guy is pissed and says "Go to the curve," in a mad tone. My friend's freakin' scared, kinda, and goes and makes a turn. They guy asks if my friend for license, registration, etc. The whole time he was gone, we just talked and talked about the situation. He told us that my friend's headlight was broken. It seemed fine to us. Oddly enough, right after the guy went to his car, people both called my brother and my friend. Funnily enough, the person who called my friend was his friend who saw him. LOL.

When he came back, he was pretty nice, gave a paper (not a ticket) and told my friend he could come out and see it. My friend stepped out and was just like "ohhhh." Fine, right? He comes back in and heads towards home. On the way, he told us how he was so freakin' nervous that he slammed the door on his fingers on the way out. LOL.

Anyways, we headed home and that was it. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that he was so excited/nervous that he started to go literally 50MPH in a 25-30MPH area. I hope he wasn't pulled over again that day.

~End

Timmy, you freakin' pervert

Alright, well today was okay. It was nice, I suppose.

Well, I left school early today but got home later than people in school. >_> Anyways, I got three teeth removed. My permanent first bi-cuspids and my second one that was a baby tooth. They kinda hurt now... Eh. Whatever.

Well, I had a party today. There were a couple highlights which were sitting with 3 other girls. ;) Nah, but that was because we had a nice talk. Lily Chen is now "Navi," Xixi is now a "BLT," and Laura has become an ellipses. Lol. Good times.

Well, the party nearly ended now and Timmy was being a freakin' pervert. A game pervert. Wth? Lol. He used the camera in Nightfire on PS2 to zoom in on women's frontal... parts... Yeah.

Good job, Moo. Good job.

Well, I guess I haven't updated in a while but who really cares? Not many people even view this blog.

Well, article of business number 1... Ah, yes. The guy floating around on the background of the blog. Who is it? Well, according to Zypher, it's daxflame. No, that's not his real name. That's the name he uses on youtube. I suppose you know what that is. If you don't, stop reading and gtfo. Anyways, Zypher says he's hilarious but I haven't had the chance to watch him because youtube didn't work at that time. I think they're just video diaries but hey, that can be fun.

Next article of business: the poll. Thankfully, dwarra is winning. For those who don't know what a dwarra is (lol inside joke right there :V That'll get the newbs asking "What's a dwarra?"), fine because it doesn't concern you. Hell, it barely concerns me.

Well to get to the main topic as shown by the title, good job. BRAVO. I was working out (OOHHH~ SEXY, EH?) and I did some curls. Then when I went to work on triceps (hold the dumbbell on both sides and up down) I did fine. When I dropped it.... it was fine. Lol. But, mine are settable weights. Kinda like a barbell in the form of a dumbell. So, there was a screw on each end. As I removed my hands, my left ring finger got stuck between the screw and one of the weights! I heard it crack and it hurt for a second. Then it started to bleed. Wtf, Moo. Wtf.

Bye.

LOL

Lots of hilarious things happened today and the day before. Let's start with yesterday.

Yesterday, I watched it a video called "SeungSooF" made by my friends. They were recording my pastor and saved a take where he was doing something. The end result? My pastor said the "F" word. He denied it and said he was saying "BRECK" (something he says for no absolute reason) but he lost in the end.

Okay, today in the morning, I saw a house TP'd. I lol'd pretty hard. But what was pretty goddamn disgusting was that it was for a birthday. That's a joke. That's nice. That's not actually the disgusting part. The part was that it was for someone's 40TH BIRTHDAY. That's sick. I understand teenagers doing it for their friends but seriously. SOMEONE 40 YEARS OLD? That's disgusting.

Last thing: my pastor's sermon. Yessir, same ol' Pastor Seungsoo F. He's a cool guy, by the way. One of the best people I know. Anyways, there were some funny things. One was that he said "pron" in his sermon. LOL. But he was trying to say "prone" but he messed up. :P Also, the other thing was that he said "I am hard." LOL. I lol'd so much. But he was meaning it like it was hard to do something or like that. Despite the reasons/actual stories, that was some hilarious stuff.

Fin.

Recent Events

Aight. I forgot to update recently/haven't found the time to update the past few days. So, let's see if I can remember something...

Well... Yesterday was "National Hug Day"... Got to hug some girls, whoop-de-doo. I also got to hug some guys. YEAA~ Gay relationships HOOO~~~ Nah, not really. But it makes for some good blogginz, huh?

Well, Zypher finally updated! As we see, he is quality over quantity, unlike me. Sadly, I didn't get o chop his off. D:

Oh, I just watched that Rice Krispies commercial with the little kid and the mom in black and white? Yeah. I can't tell if the kid is a girl of a boy. The kid's pretty high, too. He or she thinks she can hear the cereal talking. Lol.

Final note: I'm watching Forrest Gump right now. It's a damn good movie.

Becoming a Sexy Beast 101

Howday. This is Professor Zypher, here to help YOU become one sexy, sexy man. While the task does seem daunting, and your flabby, ugly ass might think you are a hopeless case, with FIVE easy steps you can become the irresistable hunk you've always wanted to be! So let's begin!

1. Stop Being A Loser.
Now, many things can define a loser. To keep things simple, we shall define a loser as a dumb kid who has no real friends and spends all his time either jerking off or picking his nose unsure of what to do with himself. This can be remedied by getting out of the house, for christ's sake. If you already do get out of the house sometimes (going to Grandma's for cookies and a warm sweater doesn't count), then congrats on being slightly less pathetic than I assumed!

2. Why The Hell Do You Look Like That?
Sometimes I wonder whether people lack mirrors in their houses when I see kids wearing the silly out-of-fashion-since-about-30-years-ago clothes they wear today. So here's a suggestion: instead of having Daddy dress you in the morning, do yourself a favor and go out to buy some real clothes. Go get a haircut that doesn't make you look like you were raised in a closet. Do whatever it takes to fix whatever's wrong with your appearance, and you will instantly notice the improvement.

3. Find Something You're Good At, And Brag About It
Confidence is the name of the game here, and if you're a secluded dweeb who doesn't have any remarkable qualities then you'd be lucky to have anyone so much as bat an eye in your direction. Find some talents, and show off these talents to people. They'll be like "omg ur amazing" and "wow i wish i could do that" and you'll no longer be that creepy guy who stares at everyone.

4. Learn How To Get Your Groove On
In today's modern society, nothing quite brings two or more people together like bumpin' and grindin'. So find yourself a nice club, and go bust a move! As long as you do it right (read: not flail around like some kid with downs) the girls will be on you like the special sauce on a Big Mac.

5. If You Think It's Cool, It's Probably Not.
Face it, your collection of Winnie the Pooh books and Lifestyle magazines aren't going to impress anyone. You might be a unique fellow (some might prefer to call you a weirdo or, more likely, a total loser), but to talk to people who are interested in more popular things, it's obviously a good idea to become well versed in said popular things. I'm just as much of a "weirdo" as you guys (hell, I moderate an RPG Maker message board), but I can still talk to people about that new movie coming out on Sunday or the new skate park they built over on Jones Road.

And there you have it! Follow these 5 steps and you can become the man any girl (or guy !_!) will fall for. Good luck, and don't screw it up!

Goddamn, Zypher. Goddamn.

This post is dedicated to Chris Malson.

Goddamn. Zypher needs to post more. MOAR MOAR! I linked him to here yesterday but he made no update. I'm going to butt rape him if he doesn't post soon. Not the good kind, either.

He seriously needs to post more. I'm going to turn this into something other than Zyphoo if he doesn't contribute more often.

If he doesn't post by the end of the week, I'm going to chop off his peen and eat it >:[ Small meal, yes, I know. If he doesn't post by next week, he's gone.

~Fin

Random bits and pieces of the 19th

Well, I'll start off with before today. On Sunday, I recall my pastor saying something funny. You know British people? They have that very sexy accent with the "tally ho" and "all that rot" and stuff. DO YOU NOTICE THAT WHEN THEY SING THE ACCENT GOES AWAY??? It's pretty magical.

Well, in the beginning of the day, my mom accused me of one of my friend's almost being my girlfriend or something because she gave me a mug >_>. THE NERVE!!!!!

What else happened.... Oh yeah, John Lee (Not Falcon >_>) kissed Sharon. She got preetttyyyy pissed/mad/sad/bad.... Well at least I managed to help her later on. :\ That's what I'm working on right now....

Basically, this day was uneventful. I can't recall half the things that happened.... Oh yeah, I had another dream involving those two girls from school.... XD I wonder if I like them....

H'OKAY GOOD BYE.

Today at lunch

Today at lunch was a most interesting time. I had a conversation with school friends which some of you may (both both guys and gals) talk about often. It was about penises.

I think this all started off by using my friend's calculator to first say "Steve butt secks" over and over then changing the message. I have no idea how the topic came about, but my friends started asking random guys if they jacked off. That gave quite a bit of laughs.

Later on, we didn't really pay attention much to the girls while we indulged ourselves in our talk. Now, we talked about some crazy things. We started off with the myth that a guy's peen is the length of half their foot. Now, I know that's wrong because... I just do, okay? We'll leave it at that.

Now we come to the topic of Steve. First look at him: he's pretty short. That automatically sets his peen to the function of "small." Next comes the way he looks. Combined with him being short, we must say, with all of these facts involved, his peen must be minuscule. And one of the jokes I made was that he'd jack off constantly with just his thumb and two fingers, amirite?

Now we get to the topic of pubic hair. Oh yum. Anyways, here's the story I told my friends: I was at a church retreat and I had moved rooms with two of my friends. Normal enough so far. So, they were bored and they offered me some gum. What I got sure as hell wasn't gum. The guy pulled his pants far back and revealed something either to be his balls, his pubes, or the head of the peen. That was some scary shit.

So next comes when my two friends are bored still and decide to, guess what! Pull out their pubes and place them on the pillows. That was disgusting. Then my friend told me he pulls out pubes during tests to place it on the test of the guy next to him. I got a jolly good larf out of that one.

Well, I've ranted on long enough so that ends my post for the day.

A NIGHT WITH DADDY

HE TOUCHED ME IN MY SPECIAL SPOTS
HE TOLD ME THAT HE HAD THE HOTS
AND NOW HE SAYS I HAVE THE CHANCE
TO FINALLY PULL DOWN HIS PANTS
AND WHEN I DO I SEE A PEEN
THE HAIRIEST IVE EVER SEEN
ITS LIKE THE CONGO ON HIS CROTCH
AND GOD ALL I COULD DO WAS WATCH
HE TOOK HIS HAND AND TOUCHED HIS COCK
WHICH BY NOW WAS HARD AS A ROCK
EVENTUALLY HE MOANED AND CAME
AND THEN TOLD ME TO DO THE SAME
I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO CREATE
THE WHITE STUFF HE'D EJACULATE
SO HE KNELT DOWN AND SHOWED ME HOW
AND WHEN I TOUCHED MY PEEPEE, WOW!
IT FELT SO GOOD IT MADE ME SMILE
SO I JUST TOUCHED IT FOR A WHILE
AND BY THE END I KNEW I KNEW
CUZ DADDY TOLD ME I'D COME TOO
SO THEN HE TUCKED ME INTO BED
AND CHANGED MY NICK TO ZYPHER|DEAD
I WONT EVER FORGET THIS NIGHT
WITH BEADS OF SWEAT AND STREAMS OF WHITE

The beginning

This is the first post of many to come (I hope) on zyphoo blog.

Now, I'm not going to sugarcoat this "first post" with attempts to seem nice and crap to try and get some people and then hit you with some stuff later on. No, this post is made before the Zyph in "zyphoo" got to edit it so far.

I would like to start out by if you don't like us, GTFO and don't spam. Now, this blog is made to entertain people. I sure as hell hope we don't resort to putting "drama" in here to gain female viewers. We aren't desperate. We'll delete this if no one like it.

Zypher will be publishing his blogs in his own unique font while I will post using this font. As we can see, his font is the blue typing. If he types in my font and poses me, I will chop off his e-dick.

So, that ends my first post and I hope you all enjoy.